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Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood

The Habit of Mutual Understanding

Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood
The Habit of Mutual Understanding

People who seek first to understand, then to be understood try to completely understand another person before presenting their own point of view.  Habit 5 means balancing courage and consideration and expressing our views with clarity and respect.
 
Kid Language
Listen Before You Talk:  I listen to other people’s ideas and feelings. I try to see things from their viewpoints.  I listen to others without interrupting.  I am confident in voicing my ideas.  I look people in the eyes when talking.
 
Ways to practice Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood:
  • Try to go one whole hour without talking even once. Instead, just watch the people around you and listen to what they are saying.  Good luck!
  • Think of someone in your life who you think is a good listener. What do they do that makes them a good listener?
  • The next time one of your friends is sad, notice his/her eyes or the way he/she holds his/her body.  Tell him/her you know he/she is sad and that you want to help.